Welcome to the wee hours of the morning, the most productive hours of the day. Sleeping or creating, the world is always busy at this time. Brutal honesty ushers in these hours and we are often disturbed by the layers of truth that we let slip through our words when sleep hovers heavy on our eyelids. We struggle to keep them open and when we eventually succumb, the depth of the longing in our dreams can frighten us into believing that we hate the early morning.
But we really don’t. Or at least, I do not. Even now I wish that I could perch on the edge of a dock facing an endless ocean with the echoes of my own endless thoughts with the stars blinking at me in confusion and acceptance as they realize that I, too, am a creature of the night. And if I could not gaze across the inky water, then I would wish to curl up next to a bonfire with the smoke swirling around me as I murmur my thoughts to the crackling of the embers. I like speaking of what I think. I like knowing what other people think.
There’s is a difference between people who actually want to know and the others who are simply curious. I am a Chemistry major; I prize curiosity for the sake of discovery. However, curious people are dangerous. Curious people gather secrets like moths to a flame and there are some things that I don’t want everyone to know. We all have those tidbits of information that we keep tucked away. No one is an entirely open book; there are always a few pages that we hide from the eyes of the reader.
I do not often speak of these secret things to many people. There are few people who can know anything incredibly deep about me. It takes more than curiosity to pry words from my lips. I have heard it said many a time that I am closed off, that my face doesn’t look open to conversation, that I am intimidating by the “no trespassing” expression. I may look that way, but I am not. I only wish to see if anyone is willing to work at friendship before I tell them more about myself.
You don’t trust people.
Well, you’re right. I don’t.
That’s why I write in the wee hours of the morning. I may not be open about certain subjects during the day but I can open up here. Here, you’ve put in the effort to find this little blog so I know that, while there still may be some curiosity, there was more to it than that. And so, I write honest work. Honest work, uncensored work, “word vomit” work is the work that touches people most. Perhaps more importantly, it touches me the most. I hate reading over my own writing (any of the novel posts will tell you that much) but I will sometimes read through these ramblings to see what is going on inside my own mind.
My favorite time of day is early morning. It welcomes all types of people, from any walk of life, without harboring any hint of judgement. You can take your mask off in this place and stay awhile…well, at least until the sun creeps over the horizon to peer at us. Until then, though, join me. I’ll be waiting in the corner table of your mind, when the clock hands grow weary and slow over the 2, where the moon sings karaoke and the stars swing dance all the night long.
You should come here more often, these wee hours of the morning. Everyone is welcome here.